I had PN (peripheral neuropathy) for about three years, and with hindsight I can say that it was one of the complications of HIV and its medications that held me deep in depression for a very long time. PN is caused by damage to the nerves that serve the peripheral extremities such as hands and feet. HIV itself can cause PN, however, most people feel its painful wrath sometime after taking certain HIV medications. I was taking ddI (Videx), d4T (Zerit) and 3TC (Epivir), back in the early ‘90s. The neurologist I was seeing added prednisone to my regimen and amitriptyline to see if these two additional medications might ease the pain. When all else fails, if it’s a mammal give it some prednisone! These drugs helped somewhat—amitriptyline when taken at high doses helped quite a bit—but the side effects were making me feel like a zombie. You know what eased the pain? Marijuana, that terrible, gateway drug that America must win the war against. Sorry, enough about failed war efforts. When I smoked half a joint the pain went away as long as I kept off my feet. When I had to get up and move my carcass around, no matter what I had popped or smoked, the PN came back. But the pot did help keep the pain at bay for a longer period of time than the “white man’s drug.” What finally worked was switching off the infamous “d” drugs I was taking. Now let’s get real about this pain. When you read the medical establishment’s definition of PN it usually talks about throbbing, tingling and aching—sometimes they get a little real and mention a burning sensation. But I’ll tell you what it’s like. It is like frostbite. I’ve never really had frostbite, but have read about it and I have played too long in the snow and gotten to the point when my feet got so cold that they were numb and hurt something awful. I’ll tell you what else it’s like. It’s like walking slowly over hot coals. Never done that either but I don’t have to, to know it’s going to burn like hell. A friend of mine who has never kicked PN and who went to work on crutches for a while due to the severity of the pain told me it’s like someone is digging red, hot pokers into the bottom of his feet. His description reminds me all too well of what my pain was like. The pain is excruciating and debilitating. |